Problems with passwords

Managing editor Henry Youtt knows password security is important but it isnt at the top of his list of things to worry about.

Managing editor Henry Youtt knows password security is important but it isn’t at the top of his list of things to worry about.

Passwords are the keys to our social media accounts, our mobile devices, our college application profiles, and even our banking accounts. And with the increasing digitalization of information, they have essentially become the keys into our lives. Access to our online identity, academic future, and financial security are all guarded by the names of our dead pets and favorite rock bands. You would think, with such significant control over our lives, our passwords would be created with substantial consideration and should certainly not be, just for example, BagelDonut$ or something. (And, no, I don’t use this password anymore.)

But let’s be real. I am much more worried about when Rihanna will release her new album.

— Henry Youtt

So-called password “experts” suggest that these combinations of letters, numbers, and symbols should not simply be words but phrases, arguing that codes like AdeleCanRunM3Over provide more security to users. However, while that’s fantastic to know and I do want Adele to run me over, I don’t want to remember more than I have to. Not to mention, think of all the time wasted typing in such a lengthy combination! How can I pride myself in being an efficient student and diligent individual if I can’t optimize the time I type in C00lPikachu. (Let’s respect my humble beginnings, alright?)

That being said, why does it matter that I include uppercase letters, lowercase letters, a number, and a symbol? If someone hates me enough to try hacking my Starbucks Rewards account, I have bigger problems than losing the twelve bucks in there. At this point, criminals getting unauthorized access to the occasional pennies in my Bank of America account honestly isn’t too big of a loss.

To be fair, the potential for random individuals to get into my private information does worry me. Why wouldn’t it? But let’s be real. I am much more worried about when Rihanna will release her new album. Don’t even get me started on Frank Ocean, that liar.

So, is there a problem with passwords? Yes. Should students be concerned about it? Definitely. Do I as an active student, as a social individual, and as a future career professional care about the security of my online presence? Not really. Just don’t let anyone know my Club Penguin password: BlueBob65. (More so to maintain my street cred than anything else.)