Apparently I have three massive knots in my back due to stress and per the doctor’s orders, I need to somehow get rid of that. I asked whether there was some other prescription besides de-stressing, but I guess that would be trying to get away from the problem. 

I tried to resolve things by taking a bubble bath, but as expected, that wasn’t enough. Dumbfounded, I asked myself what I could do to accomplish this great feat of getting rid of stress, and given that I still don’t have an answer, I suppose that’s why I’m writing this.

I have no idea how to de-stress. Honestly, I don’t think I’ve even really tried. I think a part of me relies on it in order to get things done. Stress is natural, sometimes even good. Of course too much of anything is bad and ironically enough, whenever I find myself too deep in stress, I suddenly find it’s all gone. It’s not that I discover last minute miraculous coping mechanisms, it’s just that I sort of check out entirely. Not good, either. Out of the two modes I usually find myself in, that is definitely the less preferred one. 

So here I am trying to mitigate my stress level just to the point where I don’t have to worry about it bubbling over to become that. No more, no less, because as I said, I’ve come to rely on stress. 

What I really need though is a severe undershoot so that way I can live my life balancing a new equilibrium between, I don’t know, tranquility and stress (as opposed to stress and more stress). I’m tired of walking those tight lines and I know my body evidently is too. 

So what am I going to do in order to find this new balance? Well, it gets tricky for me because sometimes, like when I’m invested in a book or something that I really care about, I remember that responsibilities just aren’t everything. They’re necessary and need to be tended to, but certainly not everything. A good revelation for most people, but again, I think it’s particularly dangerous for me. I tend to take things to extremes and so I think the balance I really need to perfect is going between the extremes of caring way too much and forgetting to care altogether. 

In short, I need to let myself have a break without letting it go on for a week long. And part of the reason I think I’m so prone to missteps like that is because, going back to the original problem, I don’t often make time here and there to de-stress and, as a result, I end up burnt out and in good need of a longer break. So in an effort to prevent that from happening, here and there in little spurts, I need to just relax. Brearthe, de-stress, take a bubble bath, whatever you want to call it, every so often. Since spring is finally here, do some spring cleaning and upkeep on your mental health.