Trust is the basis of all human connections including friendships and intimate relationships. In high school it’s easy to put up walls and fear letting anyone in. With all the gossip that gets spread around, complete strangers can base their interpretation of someone due to what they’ve heard from others. Many have put their guard up after being let down by someone, now wondering who is safe to trust.

One of the main reasons for the lack of trust people experience is because they’ve been hurt in the past. Often times we let our past dictate our future. It’s easy to tell someone to just move on and start over. What’s not easy is opening up to someone new after letting someone know everything about you only to have them use it against you. Past experiences with broken trust can derail the potential of forming any new healthy relationships.

Those people who have hurt others, those who have potentially ruined the belief that some people do actually have good intentions, those who didn’t care how this would affect the person they were hurting, probably did it for numerous reasons. Sometimes their motives were never right in the first place. Sometimes it’s because people change and those who start off with the best intentions then become consumed by their own personal demons and take it out on others. Whatever the reason, those people who were able to hurt someone that really cared for them messed up something imperative.

I have found myself in this situation more than I’ve liked to. Normally, I would be the one to say that it’s possible to get past the fear of opening up to people and that there are people who do have the best intentions. But as of right now I am someone who understands the feeling of not wanting anyone to get too close.  Time is the only thing that truly heals and to those who may be in the same position, I believe there will be a day when we’re able to let someone in again.

Trust is vital in healthy relationships, but not everyone is able to give parts of themselves away to people who end up leaving. It’s easier to not share much with someone and having them stay in your life, than telling someone everything only to have them walk out. If there’s someone who is unable to open up, chances are they’ve been burned in the past and need someone new to show them that there are good people again.

Sincerely,

Sydney