Now that the most nostalgic and bittersweet holiday is over, I feel that it’s important to talk about the equality of partners in a relationship.

Now, even though I’ve been involved in very few relationships, I still believe that I know a thing or two about what healthy relationships look like.

I’m pretty old school when it comes to certain matters, but when it comes to the whole “guys paying for dates” thing, I don’t necessarily agree. Maybe on a first date, the guy will pay just to be a gentleman, but that shouldn’t be the case every time. Just as the effort that partners put into relationships have to be two-sided, when it comes to paying for things, the two partners should take turns. This applies to same-sex relationships just as it applies to different ones. 

Age and gender have no effect on this. Simply put, I think that partners should alternate paying for things because it’s fair and portrays the image that both people care about the relationships. Not that this happens very often, but it’s also to make sure that one person isn’t being taken advantage of. 

I had a friend who would pay for all of her boyfriend’s meals, gas, etc., and it was an extremely toxic relationship. The guy took advantage of her and didn’t respect her whatsoever.

When you communicate and establish certain boundaries with your partner, you’re more likely to last longer with that person. 

However, it’s important to remember that every couple is different and has different wants and needs. So at the end of the day, what’s most important is that you’re in a happy, healthy, and consensual relationship.