I support too many artists.

Let me rephrase: I do not have the money to support as many artists as I do.

Over the past few years, several bands and singers have come to the DFW, and every time my plans to go have fallen through.

I feel like I’ve missed out on the hype. 

I have many friends that are well-versed in the process: weaving their way through a Ticketmaster queue of tens of thousands of people, snagging great seats, and choosing an outfit that leaves everyone envious.

I, however, do not have the funds to sustain my dreams. 

When the Loona tickets were announced a day before they were going on sale, I genuinely felt lightheaded. I was not financially prepared to make that cost, and I was even less prepared to actually put those plans into action.

The whole process is expensive if you want tickets closer to the stage, or the ability to enter the venue sooner—and the whole process gives me anxiety.

When I was twelve, I went to a Haley Morales meet-n-greet, and it’s safe to say that it was the worst experience of my life.

The venue was icky at best, disorganized, and overcrowded. At worst, a trash fire. And despite it not costing that much, I still felt that I neither got what I paid for, nor that I had fun. 

That experience sits with me subconsciously, in a way—whenever I see that someone is going on tour, I think about the process of picking out an outfit, or asking someone to go, all for the possibility of a letdown, and I wrinkle my nose before scrolling past the ad.

Not to mention my general aversion to unfamiliar people and surroundings. The likelihood of me swearing up a storm because of a stranger in anticipation of Taylor Swift is too high for me to confidently purchase a ticket. 

The cons of going to a concert often deter me from the process entirely, but I also feel that I have to soldier through it before I can properly take a stance on them, especially since when I have purchased tickets, the plans fall through.

At the end of the day, it’s about the experience—maybe I’ll be in that Ticketmaster queue on the 18th for Taylor Swift tickets—or maybe I’ll be sulking about it on Twitter.