If there’s one thing that can be said about me, it’s that I can be really night and day with my tone at times.

Most of the time, it’s truly out of my control, and things come out in ways they shouldn’t without me giving it a second thought until at least a few hours after the fact.

That being said, there are times when it is completely intentional, and I’m not gonna lie: I can get mean.

I’ve grown up in a family where a majority of us are women or assigned female at birth, so I’ve absolutely mastered passive aggression in all its forms, both blatant and subtly.

I think it’s a part of why I try so hard to pick apart what people are saying to me and how it’s said—I know that I am not always upfront with what I’m saying, so I have to wonder if that’s what is being done to me.

Being quietly malicious is a little funny, though.

Sure, sending “yeah, that’s fine.” or “okay.” in a text is kind of immature, but in a couple of weeks, I’ll think about how I was mad enough to do all that and still not actually say anything, which is a little embarrassing.

If someone makes you mad, or annoyed, frustrated, whatever the case, just say it. You’ll probably feel better about it afterward.

I won’t be following that advice, but theoretically, it’ll solve the problem, and you won’t have to waste energy on being passive-aggressive. 

Especially if the person you’re talking to doesn’t realize that you’re being passive-aggressive, which will probably transform that passiveness to full-on aggression.

Just know if we’re talking, and I seem mad, I’m not. If I am, you’ll get the rudest sounding ‘okay’ you’ve heard in your entire life.