As the end of the school year is peaking out from the horizon, I’ve become more emotional and nostalgic. I’ve grown to really appreciate the little, mundane moments in day-to-day life. It’s hard to imagine in a few short months that childhood is going to end, and that I will be an adult. It’s a crazy concept that by crossing an abstract line dictated by a date, you are officially considered mature and grown. We don’t magically become wiser do we? If that was the case, I fear we wouldn’t have frat boys in the world.
The drives home from school, mock trial practice, and sporting events are some of my favorite moments. I’m in a car by myself most of the time, and sitting at a spotlight, I’m weirdly reflective. However, I’m not psycho so I don’t do it in silence. I actually listen to music in the car. I have an entire playlist dedicated to my senior year, and the one song that never fails to make me choke up and just reminisce about my high school years the most is Ribs by Lorde.
There’s a line in the chorus that goes: “I’ve never felt more alone, it feels so scary getting old”. If that doesn’t perfectly sum up life at the moment, I don’t know what does. I have no idea how Lorde managed to capture what it’s like to be a teenage girl but she did it somehow. Another lyric that I resonate with is “how you wish it could be all the time”. I really do wish I could just freeze the frame or slow it down to just make it last longer.
The moment of the song that makes me fully tear up, though, is the bridge. “I want ‘em back, the minds we had”. Everybody raves about youth, and not knowing anything else about what’s going to happen in life is just a daunting concept. There are also parts of the song where I really appreciate the friendships I have made, and the thought of separating in a few months just keeps me up at night. Some of these friendships I have forged over a lifetime…it’s just depressing that I have to leave them to start my adult life.
Some honorable mentions include Space Song by Beach House, Supercut and Team by Lorde (again), and Forever Young by Alphaville. I honestly think if any of these songs play at graduation my makeup will be dripping off onto my gown.
It’s Christine Against the Clock, one I feel is running out too fast.
