“Opposites attract.”

We’ve all heard this one. Whether it’s a law from your chemistry class or a cliche passed down, it offers reassurance of compatibility in just two words.

But what exactly does “opposite” mean? And more importantly, can opposites truly last? 

Maybe we were just taught this phrase so we wouldn’t fear someone who is the opposite of how we see ourselves and approach them believing it’ll work.

Let’s imagine you’re the outgoing, social butterfly and meet someone introverted and shy, reading a book in the back. Would you pass by each other without a second thought? You’d be strangers and nothing more. Or would the combination of these different traits actually be good for both of you? Maybe it could push you out of your limits and invite new adventures, ones you never would have found inside your comfort zone. 

Opposite personalities are the entertainment industry’s favorite. From books to movies we constantly come across character pairings like the optimist and realist, or the on-the-go and the has-five-backup-plans. There are even set tropes like “enemies to lovers” and “grumpy x sunshine” that focus on opposite personalities or mindsets learning how to accept each other. 

So what does this teach us? 

That opposites attract. 

Then again, there are people who argue these couples probably break up the second the movie or book ends. 

Still, opposites can only work when there’s some form of middle ground. After all, most real connections stem from common interests or having something in common. You can’t exactly hold an insightful conversation if someone loves sports and the other is absolutely clueless. Sure you can try reading up on the subject but is that really the same? How much could each of you change before you stopped being yourselves? 

Sparks can’t last without something fueling the fire. You don’t have to like what the other person likes but you should care enough about them to have an opinion about it or at least respect it. Otherwise you’ll just end up like the x’s and y’s in algebra, changing their values but never quite combining. 

Maybe it’s not the personalities or interests that matter. At the end of the day, it’s the willingness to meet each other halfway.